Friday, December 30, 2005

Join Unity and See the World!

Earn extra cash too!!

By not joining Unity, you are missing a trip to lovely Boston to the AFT Convention in this summer. Just think of it: you could be with 800 other Unity brothers and sisters, all expenses paid by the dupes that elected us. And don’t forget the yearly NYSUT conventions, unfortunately held somewhere in New York State. But we promise to do what we can to move these conventions to Paris. And you can do what you like at these conventions because you don’t have to be responsible to the membership.

Worried about getting elected? No sweat. We have stacked the deck in your favor through AT-LARGE VOTING, where the entire membership, including the over 50,000 retirees get to vote for you. And you only have to run every 3 years. (Don’t you wish it were 10?)

When you join Unity you become eligible for an after school union job. Get the same pay as all those non-Unity teachers slaving away in after school programs. And you get an extra UFT pension. Don’t worry about competition from non-Unity members. These jobs are never posted and are reserved solely for YOU!!! Demonstrate total loyalty and you can get the big enchilada: A FULL-TIME UNION JOB!

Here’s all you have to do: Take a blood oath to be loyal to whatever policies the leadership hands down. Vote the way you are told to at AFT and NYSUT conventions and at the Delegate Assembly. Now for the easiest part: convince yourself that any dissent from the leadership’s views is destructive and anti-union. Make sure to attack and browbeat anyone in your school who might be reading ICE, UTP or TJC literature. Pull any leaflets you see from mailboxes. Rat out anyone expressing an anti-unity point of view to the principal.



At 6:50 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow. That sure beats working.

Sign me up!

At 7:04 AM, Blogger Propaganda Pete, UFT Minister of Truthiness said...

Don't forget the weekends in Atlantic City going to see Yanni!!!

At 7:17 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thanks for the truthiness. I always thought the postings for Unity jobs was an already done deal for someone else.

At 7:57 AM, Anonymous Prodigal Son said...

Thanks for helping me EdzUp.

I'm a CL and UTP member. Our DR offered Unity membership to me (even though they said the UTP were Nazis, fascists, left-wing, right-wing, etc.)if I secured a yes vote in our school. I declined. I was foolish and young.

But that was before I knew about the Boston trip and the extra cash....

I feel funny now: kinda different. You know, I'm startin' to see the error of my ways; in fact, I think I'm startin' to see the light! Cash AND Trips! Oh I was lost but now I'm found. Praise the CHEESE! Bless the mighty Gouda?!

Charlie, where is dat application now!?

At 8:05 AM, Blogger brownnose said...

Do not take the name of Fromage in vain, child. Verily shalt thou be transmogrified into the anthropomorphic wilderness of places undwelt, for the mere mention of the interstellar calphalon is less heuritic than even the mighty helioplast.

No one is second to brownnose in loyalty to Le Gran Fromage! May her flag forever wave!

At 8:18 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

There you go again Redpig, posting under another name. Be proud of your love for her. Let your Jellyfish tentacles wrap around her.

Blessed be the Grand Mozzarella!

At 8:42 AM, Blogger brownnose said...

Nothing that anonymous said has contradicted Brownnose. We in Unity are always willing to wave the polka-dot bloomers but never the white flag. We are stalwart in our determinism to overcome those who come over!

All glory to Le Gran Fromage! Brownnose has spoken!

At 9:26 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

This just proves that we need vouchers! The school monopoly is the ruination of us all! Lips that touch liquor will never touch mine.


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